new year's and recent activities

So, I drove down to Georgia for new year's. I took a friend with me (I'm not dumb, after all). I went to meet in person a dominant man I met online.

He was nothing like I expected. I mean, physically he was. It wasn't exciting or disappointing, it just was what it was. But mentally, emotionally, intellectually, dominantly (is that a word?) there was just something lacking.
And I didn't feel that certain spark that I need, that magic.
First of all, he was kind of wimpy to be a dominant man. He was very respectful though, and a gentleman. Also, he was kind of whiny. And bossy. Which, i know that sounds contradicting, but this was only the first time we met. You have to take baby steps and build up the relationship to the level you want. It was like he just wanted to go from point A to point F without going through b-e. I kind of felt bad for feeling this way, but that's just the way it was.
It took me about a day after I got home to realize that I felt this way.
He was way too intense for me all at once.
Also, he seemed to be very clingy and I don't like that,e specially in public (with anyone).

So my friend and I left a day early to go see this band play in SC, but we got to the place, pulled in and didn't even go inside. It was a scary looking place. We decided to head back to NC for new years and I got a little toasted and made out with my gay friend on new year's eve. It was lovely.

In other news, I've been working all the time and breaking even, which is better than coming up in the negative I suppose.

Well, tootles.

KC

a day late & a dollar short

So, I know I said I would post yesterday... but yesterday was just insane. So was today, actually.

Anyway, more to the point.
More random things about me? I think that is the point.

I currently have two jobs and little free time and I never have any money. Imagine that... I thought with two jobs and no free time to spend it... but it still seems to go somewhere.

I'm terrible with budgeting and money. I barely make it. I need to marry someone who's good at that sort of thing. I'm good at hostessing and social things.

I'm really tired and I need to do laundry... which I probably won't do tonight... but i only work four hours and my 2nd job tomorrow and then I'm going to look at apartments.

Also, I have a hot date for new year's. w00t.

KC

funny, random thing

So, yesterday I was on my way home from church with my parents and my dad says "hey! listen to this song, it's so funny" and it's a song about smoking weed... on the way home from church... yeah.

I hope I'm not the only one who sees the irony here.

I have to get ready for work. I'll post something this afternoon.

KC

about me

okay, so I'm not 155... I wasn't born in 1851, but rather I am in my mid-twenties. I live in the southeast US and don't really have a southern accent despite living here my entire life.

I'm agnostic. I used to be Christian, but then I studied some of the origins of early Christianity and other philosophies and religions and realized that there is no way that anyone could ever know for sure. I know, I know, Christians will tell you otherwise... but .. well, they're wrong. Other people also are certain that I'm wrong, but I'm not certain that they're right, so that leaves me on the doorstep of agnosticism.

I am not in any kind of romantic relationship. Actually, I just got out of one exactly one week ago. I wasn't really that upset because I kind of knew it was coming. We weren't very compatible.
I haven't been in love yet, but that's not to say that it won't happen.

I've been through a lot of tough crap. I was raped when I was 17 by my (now ex, obviously) boyfriend after a whole lifetime of other sexual abuses from random people. That led me to promiscuity which led me to therapy, which helped. Now I am emotionally well balanced, healthy and mostly free from issues.

Dark secret: I'm into D/s (S&M). No one really knows this because I can see how it could be misconstrued as tied to my past. It's not. I've dealt with all of that. Also, I come from a fundamentalist christian family.
They don't know I'm agnostic.
I want to be honest and true to myself, but I know the consequences of telling them and it's better for them not to know.
I have a college degree yet I work in retail. I'm going back to college.
I just bought my first car. That was an interesting experience.

Anyway, I've been in one D/s relationship and it was wonderful. I can't explain how it seemed to be exactly right. However, the man was too old for me (okay, by too old for me, I mean he was 30 years older than me and had kids my age) and so it didn't work out. The experience, however, was worth it.

I would love to have a relationship with a dominant man closer to my age, but I have no idea where to meet them or how to go about that.

So, here I am. Recently single and not who people think I am. This is a place for me to be myself because there is no judgement here.... because no one knows who I am.

salutations!

so, hello world! My alias is kate chopin. This is my place for the most private of writings. I shall be posting soon for your reading pleasure!

KC